How is my son's school teaching him about Thanksgiving? By having a BIG Thanksgiving feast in school. Which son you ask? BOTH of them. And no, they aren't doing it together. My food allergy son is in first grade and my non food allergy son is in third grade and BOTH classes are doing a big Thanksgiving feast (and the food allergy son also did this last year in Kindergarten). Know what else? I cook a big allergy friendly Thanksgiving feast EVERY year at home and have ever since my boys were born. So my questions are: What does this actually teach my boys about Thanksgiving? And why am I being asked to basically cook THREE Thanksgiving meals (sweet potatoes for 20 for Older Boys class, a complete meal for the Little Man since he has allergies PLUS contribute something for the class, plus our own family dinner on Thanksgiving)? How do I keep the Little Man safe in a room full of 40 first graders and Kindergartners who are eating stuffing, corn bread muffins, pumpkin bread, etc. (Yes, I will be there, in fact they requested that I be there)?
Last week I wrote a post about all of the food at our school. This meal isn't necessarily "junk" food, but it's one more example of too much food in school. Why do these kids need a complete Thanksgiving meal two days before they eat a complete Thanksgiving meal? I'm highly frustrated with this whole situation. And not just for the food allergy child. I'm frustrated because I feel all of this food is perpetuating the obesity issue. I'm frustrated because I'm not sure what "food" is teaching my children. I'm frustrated because I'm being asked to do quite a bit of extra work during an already busy time of year. And of course I'm frustrated because not only is this once again singling the Little Man out as being different but it's putting him at risk for having a reaction. And it's unnecessarily putting him at risk. I am correct in my recollection that Thanksgiving is actually about more than food, aren't I? Food is only a small portion of it. There's so much more to it than that and I feel like the real lesson behind Thanksgiving is getting overshadowed by a party. Where is the learning? Hopefully I'll see some of it the day I'm at the school for the "feast" but I'm doubtful.
Other ways to teach kids about Thanksgiving without using "the feast" (as a crutch):
1. Food Drive For the Needy: How about talking about how there are people that might not have as much as we do? How about collecting food for them? The kids could put together baskets/bags of food. They could donate them to the community center that is right around the corner from the school. I would even drive the food there.
2. Make A Thankfulness Bag.
Get a brown paper lunch bag. On the front, make a picture of a turkey holding a sign that says "Made by:" with a spot for the child's name.
On the inside are 2 pieces of paper. One says:
Thank you for your loving care And the kindness that you share, For helping me to learn and grow, And showing me all that you know. That's why I just want to say, "THANK YOU" in the biggest way!
On the second sheet is:
Thankfulness Bag Ingredients 1. A rubber band - to keep our hearts tied together always 2. A candy kiss - to say thank you for all your love. 3. A penny - to say thank you for sharing my thoughts and letting me know they are important to you. 4. A warm fuzzy (small piece of furry fabric) - to make you feel good when you are sad, like you always do for me. 5. An adhesive bandage - to say thank you for all the times you make my hurts feel better. 6. A facial tissue - to say thank you for all the times you dry my tears. 7. A piece of Lifesavers candy - a circle to show that my love for you will never end.
Have all these items on hand for the children to put in their thankfulness bags (from Teaching Hearts Ultimate Thanksgiving Guide)
3. Mayflower map and quiz
4. Teach about the REAL Thanksgiving.
5. Teach about the accurate Native American Culture.
6. There's too many to even mention on The Pilgrims First Thanksgiving! I especially like teaching what life was actually life for the Pilgrims. I like teaching the children that Pilgrim children actually had jobs that they were responsible for to keep the community going.
I also like:
*Science- Read Corn is Maize by Aliki. Study Indian corn -Estimate and count kernels. Conduct a growing experiment by placing an ear of corn in water, an ear in soil, and an ear in an empty container. Then make oral and written observations about the changes. (Idea is from 'What a Corny Life', 1998 AIMS Education Foundation)
*Write and send thank you letters to community helpers, grandparents, etc.
I realize that the "feast" is fun for the kids. But do we really have to do one EVERY year? And what are they learning? The foods we are asked to provide (other than the turkey) really weren't even eaten at the first Thanksgiving. I'd really like to see our school teach Thanksgiving in a fashion that doesn't always rely on food.
Does your school do the big feast? If you have a food allergy child how do you handle it? How many times does your school do the feast, is it done just once or does it get repeated in different grades?
9 comments:
Thankfully we don't have a Thanksgiving Feast this year (although we did last year)! Bella's teacher this year doesn't do much food related stuff (thank goodness).
I'm sure we'll be back on the Thanksgiving train next year though (ugh).
Big hugs to you as you navigate through the holidays! :)
Thanks Gab! I think I could use a hug right now. They also wanted to make pasta necklaces because "he wasn't going to eat it". UGH :(
K-'s Kindergarten did a Thanksgiving feast. You paid three dollars and they brought it in from Bob Evans. They also did an Easter Bunny feast that asked parents to donate different vegetables. I was okay with it because it was just a kindergarten thing. There was a peanut allergic child in K-'s class that I watched like a hawk. There was a time that I scooped up his cupcake and told him that he couldn't have it because it wasn't safe for him. I felt so bad and explained it to his mom. He didn't cry, but still . . .
I know that people think that if the kids don't eat it, they'll be okay. That may be true in some cases but not all.
When my older two boys were small, the school they were in at the time had the kids dress as Indians or Pilgrims and had little bits of things they might have actually eaten back then, like pemmican. I liked that much better that the whole Thanksgiving feast they had at a different school in later years. It never made sense to me to have that at school the day before a big Thanksgiving feast at home, except that I guess there might be one or two kids who might not have a big Thanksgiving meal at home. But I like your ideas much better -- it is about so much more than food.
Yes, too much food in school! Once my son made it out of Kindergarten, things have become manageable, but I feel for the parents of fa kids who aren't able to be there personally to supervise. (My husband and I work opposite schedules just so we don't have daycare and are always available to be present at school functions.)
I have a feeling, though, that since food allergies are continuing to increase, that food might start to be kept out of schools more and more. Here's hoping!
Thank you for your post. You make me fell so much less insane. We just got done with the Halloween hooplah and now on to Thanksgiving...it is so exhausting! My preschooler is allergic to nuts, dairy, eggs, wheat and soy so class parties and activites are a TON of work.
At the Halloween party the few parents who were setting up kept putting snacks on his plate (the kids were at recess) and I kept silently moving them to another plate. Finally one of the dads said "Why are you doing that?"..."Uhhhh my son is allergic to everything that you are putting on for the plate..."
Whew! I went home and told my husband that it was final, we were going to have to go to every class party...and there are so many of them!!!
I also feel like a stalker when I have to pump the teacher for when and what the kids are doing so that we can plan ahead. I showed up one day and the kids were off to the pumpkin patch...and we were not informed!! Talk about a giving a mom a near heart attack!! (We live in a really small town and apparently they don't "do" permission slips in case you were wondering).
den mother,
Ah, I feel like we live parallel lives. Our situations are so similar. I feel like a stalker too. And I feel like if I'm not at that school every day, something slips through the cracks that could be potentially harming. I've written every thing out for them, I've spent time educating them (over and over again!), I'm there all the time, I'm room mom... I'm not sure what else I can do other than DEMAND that do away with all this food. I've tried not to go there because I know that it isn't fair to the other children and I know there will be backlash from some of the parents. I'm desperately trying to work with them while keeping my child safe but they aren't working with me.
It is exhausting! Hang in there. I know we are doing the best we can and really we have no other options right now. Thanks for commenting!
You know I am in agreement about too much food/parties during school. It seems that everything needs to be a "celebration." I learned plenty about the first Thanksgiving and we never had a meal to go with it.
Our school does not do a Thanksgiving feast, and I am glad about that fact. Although, to be honest, if we were larger and had more funding/volunteers, I'm pretty sure it would begin.
Instead, our kids participate in a food drive and the whole school goes to Mass. That's perfect in my book. Good luck to you and the boys at school during the holidays!
I totally want to email this blog post to my daughters teacher!!!
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